im six kinds of drunk right now
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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