i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize