Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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