Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
