I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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