yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize