You really coming over, don't trick.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
