Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
