so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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