So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
