I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
