I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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