That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
