genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
