Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
