8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize