does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize