Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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