in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
