quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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