What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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