Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
she pinky promised me she was 18
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
