May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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