Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
