remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
When did angry sex become our thing?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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