Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
