How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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