We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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