She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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