Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..