So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
