wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
