Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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