Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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