Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
