I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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