I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
