what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
