I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
