New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
