Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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