i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize