is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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