not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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