New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
