Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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