The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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