I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
