Don't make out with my wife yet
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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