shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
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My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
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I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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